Lately one song has resonated with my spirit. The Spirit enjoys worshiping the Father with me as I belt out these lyrics by Leeland at the top of my lungs. I could listen to it continuously and never tire of it. Worship our God with me...
Thursday, November 26, 2009
Thanksgiving Reflection
During this Thanksgiving Season I have reflected a bit about my previous year. It has been a year of change. Several changes in job and consequently location. These changes are visual changes and can be observed by anyone. But I know and some of my close friends know that a bigger change is taking place. God has been continuing his sanctifying work in my heart and mind. Both are being renewed to reflect his image more and more. I feel this change began after hearing Terry Esau speak at the Okoboji Bible Conference. I left feeling a deep desire to live an authentic life wholly devoted to my Lord and Savior. I passionately prayed that God would change my heart - change my desires. The experience of leaving my comfortable job at Northwestern to gain more experience and to "climb the corporate ladder" only to be threatened by lay-off and ultimately laid-off further changed me and my desires. The "normal life" just doesn't have the same appeal that it once had. Nothing is guaranteed apart from Christ. Again I was taught that my hope is not in this life or anything it offers. As I look towards heaven this world fades.
My year has been filled with tremendous growth. Living with great guys in both Ankeny and Omaha challenged me and held me accountable. Living back home was humbling and a great time to reflect and re-evaluate. At home I was involved in a reading group with my pastor, my brother and several others. We went through Elisabeth Elliot's Mark of a Man which taught me many ways I was not the man I needed to be. This book lead me to read Shadow of the Almighty - the biography of Jim Elliot. This book has forever changed me as a man. I am now working through his journals. May God give me grace to live as Jim lived. He had such an eternal perspective and was not drawn to this world but rather fled (in a dead spring) anything that might come between he and God (even women!)
I am thankful for God's work in my life this past year. Though some of the experiences were uncomfortable - they have been for my good. They have deepened my trust in Him. I have a Heavenly Father who loves me and wants to show me His love by teaching me more about Himself and refining me into a man He can use. He has provided so many valuable experiences - may I never forget one of them. I am thankful for my singleness. As difficult as that is to say, it has allowed me to grow without distraction and I am confident it will make me into a better husband and father. This does not mean I have no desire for marriage but I will continue to trust my God - He is a big God. I look forward to celebrating Christ's birth in the upcoming month - Christmas season is a glorious time. I also look forward to the new year and what it will bring - I pray it is more growth in the knowledge of Christ my Savior.
My year has been filled with tremendous growth. Living with great guys in both Ankeny and Omaha challenged me and held me accountable. Living back home was humbling and a great time to reflect and re-evaluate. At home I was involved in a reading group with my pastor, my brother and several others. We went through Elisabeth Elliot's Mark of a Man which taught me many ways I was not the man I needed to be. This book lead me to read Shadow of the Almighty - the biography of Jim Elliot. This book has forever changed me as a man. I am now working through his journals. May God give me grace to live as Jim lived. He had such an eternal perspective and was not drawn to this world but rather fled (in a dead spring) anything that might come between he and God (even women!)
I am thankful for God's work in my life this past year. Though some of the experiences were uncomfortable - they have been for my good. They have deepened my trust in Him. I have a Heavenly Father who loves me and wants to show me His love by teaching me more about Himself and refining me into a man He can use. He has provided so many valuable experiences - may I never forget one of them. I am thankful for my singleness. As difficult as that is to say, it has allowed me to grow without distraction and I am confident it will make me into a better husband and father. This does not mean I have no desire for marriage but I will continue to trust my God - He is a big God. I look forward to celebrating Christ's birth in the upcoming month - Christmas season is a glorious time. I also look forward to the new year and what it will bring - I pray it is more growth in the knowledge of Christ my Savior.
Thursday, November 19, 2009
Here goes nothin'
Hello world! This is my crack at the world of blogging. I know, I know - I am a bit behind the times. I never thought I had much worthwhile to say and was usually unopinionated. It seems this is changing as I begin to grow older - I am beginning to think deeper about things. I must stop and say that this blog will anything but deep contemplations rather mostly internal musings. Enough of the "standard" first blog post jargon.
Tonight I was checking out at Walmart and I began to smirk a bit. I had this vision of myself as Macaulay Culkin in Home Alone. I was acting like a grown up while being left on my own - going to the grocery store all by myself for "just the necessities" - although not for a toothbrush. However, I am not Macaulay Culkin and this is not a movie - but I am home alone?! I guess not home alone but alone away from home. I am recently in a new city away from family and friends. This is what I wanted so badly some days previous to the move. To be alone in a new city where nobody (or not many) knows you. I find their is some freedom in this setting. I never imagined it would be Sioux Falls, SD (always thought Seattle or Denver or someplace intriguing) but God knows what he is doing. Back at Walmart - I did manage to pick up a treat for myself. I am usually pretty strict with what I buy especially when it comes to food. If I don't have something unhealthy sitting around, I won't be tempted to eat it. But tonight it was a little Ben & Jerry's ice cream! Here's to finding joy in the little things!
So welcome to my life. Previously I would pride myself on being mysterious and keeping to myself for the most part. I guess this is my attempt at letting the rest of the world in on me - at least a little! My desire now is to be transparent and authentic. Whether you like it or not, you got me!
Tonight I was checking out at Walmart and I began to smirk a bit. I had this vision of myself as Macaulay Culkin in Home Alone. I was acting like a grown up while being left on my own - going to the grocery store all by myself for "just the necessities" - although not for a toothbrush. However, I am not Macaulay Culkin and this is not a movie - but I am home alone?! I guess not home alone but alone away from home. I am recently in a new city away from family and friends. This is what I wanted so badly some days previous to the move. To be alone in a new city where nobody (or not many) knows you. I find their is some freedom in this setting. I never imagined it would be Sioux Falls, SD (always thought Seattle or Denver or someplace intriguing) but God knows what he is doing. Back at Walmart - I did manage to pick up a treat for myself. I am usually pretty strict with what I buy especially when it comes to food. If I don't have something unhealthy sitting around, I won't be tempted to eat it. But tonight it was a little Ben & Jerry's ice cream! Here's to finding joy in the little things!
So welcome to my life. Previously I would pride myself on being mysterious and keeping to myself for the most part. I guess this is my attempt at letting the rest of the world in on me - at least a little! My desire now is to be transparent and authentic. Whether you like it or not, you got me!
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